The Merriment of Thieves

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The Merriment of Thieves
Author Unknown
Genre Poetry

“The Merriment of Thieves” has been a collection of poems that has persisted for years, some say a century, in the Regalian Sewers. Every few years, a new edition appears in the Sewers for those who live there to read it. The later editions never take away poems and only add them, resulting in a sizeable pocket book. It seems that the Great Sewer Boom under the Lo Occupation was still not enough to halt the production of this text. As late as March 305 AC, several copies of “Edition No.17” have surfaced. ((The following texts are excerpts and do not reflect the full possible text.))

The Merriment of Thieves

Stem of the Poison Rose

Your leaves run black,
Your stem, Onyx,
And your thorns a' prepared- to attack!
Never get near,
For the bloom, o' it sears,
And all of your riches, they're mine!
Nothing you own, is safe- from- me!

Ironically Generous

You're lucky that I do not take everything,
I leave some for you, some for me!
You're desperately trying,
To escape op-er-tun-i-ty!
I spread the wealth,
Make it all even,
It's not like it dangers your health!


But a little, tiny, thing.
You cause so much terror;
You're built for breaking,
You leave no room for error.
You little tiny serpent,
Nothing better than a spy.
May the Void have mercy, repent,
You'll suffer once you die!

The Heretical Poem

Serpent be it
Estel retrieve it
Spirit dream it
Allar downed
Sihai frowned
Heresy be found
What did they do,
The evil it's drew
Living In Peace
A dream released
The Ailor rule
Noble jewel
Guard patrol
Prejudice unrolled
But why?
Why even try
The rich man is blind
Oh, what they’ll find


  • Some of the other notable poems include “The Knife won’t Fit”, “Lovett’s Pies” and “Me Orkag”.
  • It is not known who compiles these stories together, but some wild theories claim it is the Regalian Government, using the collection to slowly turn the sewer dwellers into better people through subtle word use. This “subtle message” theory is sometimes the cause of bar fights down in the Sewers.

Writers MiningToBedrock_, cpt_manta_ray
Processors MonMarty
Last Editor HydraLana on 10/14/2023.

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